Facing our Fears

   When I was growing up my best friends were sisters Emily and Susan who lived exactly eight houses up the street. That was also equal to about 10 pedals on my bike (once I was allowed past the fire hydrant by myself) or about 105ish big steps (yes, we counted).  We were the kind of kids that spent most of the summer outside playing National Geographic Explorer in the creek that ran behind our houses. This is where I discovered one of my biggest childhood fears - snakes. I don't remember being afraid of monsters under the bed, spiders or anything else. I was surprised by a snake once while walking near the creek and that was it. I remember being freaked out for the next several years. It's not so much freaked out by snakes in general - but it was more about the surprise of the snake. If snakes would just have announced themselves before crossing my path - maybe I wouldn't have been so afraid.    Anyway, I spent a lot of time as a youngster asking my parents and brother to check my room, closet and other dark places for snakes.
     It's common for young children to have fears like this and they are often very different depending on the child and their environment, experiences and background.  A while ago, a certain young relative of mine was afraid of the "invisible man" that was only in the bathroom - any bathroom. We spent a lot of time inspecting closets, bathtubs and under sinks looking for the "invisible man" and asking him to please "step out" of the room so we could use the facilities.
     The book "The Alligator in Naomi's Pillow" by David Giuliano is a wonderful story for children about fears and how to face them.  I found it on a list of recommended books for kids on Pintrest. I couldn't find it in the local library so I ordered a copy from Amazon. It is available for borrowing from the church library!
   This is a wonderful story about a little girl who goes to her parents at night and tells them about the alligator that came out of her pillow and wants to bite her neck. The story is a great way to get kids talking about what they may be afraid of - and a how adults can help them deal with those fears. Naomi's parent's try several different ways in the story to get rid of the alligator - but in the end it is Naomi who finds a way to deal with her fears.
   At the end of the book, there is a great guide for parents on some ways to talk with children about fears.  The author suggests asking "wondering" questions through which you can model that there are many answers and imaginative responses. Good stuff.
     " I wonder what the alligator was doing in the pillow," is one question example suggested by the author. My father used to do this. "I wonder if you realize that snakes are probably just as afraid of you as you are of them," he would tell me.  I am still trying to convince myself of this! I live in the country - I have gotten much better about snakes - kinda sorta!